That sounds like a harsh statement about something that I really enjoy but it is very true. While some might say that every fandom and community has its toxic elements they aren't this bad. As a video game fan I can look at all of the big games, with big communities, and while there is always trash talk and boasting the community is never a toxic place. Unless you play League of Legends then yes that is a toxic video game community probably the only one I can think of that you should avoid, play Heroes of the Storm or Smite. Yet, these things like I said are not as bad as the anime community.
Why is that ?? What makes the anime community such a toxic environment ??
Well I believe that the people involved in the community are the biggest part of that problem. That certain people in the anime community make things so uncomfortable for everyone else that you immediately want to distance yourself from it. I don't want to say it is a large percentage but there are quite a few people in the community known as "elitists" those people that like anime but will criticize everyone's choices in anime because they feel it isn't a good anime or that it is too mainstream or that it is just generally a shit anime. These types of people almost go out of their way to alienate members of the community and it isn't something I see anywhere else. I found this picture which kind of gives an idea of the typical things you see from anime elitists.
I'll give a personal example and one that may draw heat on me but that's fine. As an anime fan conventions are a great thing, a way to meet people that enjoy the same things you do, but the only convention that had anything to do with anime in my city for years was Kita Kon. An anime convention in town sounds perfect right ?? Except those same kinds of people, the ones I explain are the toxic elitists, the ones that try to shame those that don't have or share their opinions, those were the people in charge of the whole thing. It is a difficult thing to have something in your city that relates to what you like doing yet it was run and ruined by the anime elitist people in charge. It was something that as a fan I avoided with a passion because I don't feel like having the anime I like being judged by a handful of people. I watch what I watch to have fun and enjoy it and not to be criticized by people because of it. I'm glad that a toxic thing like that is gone which is an awful thing to say but it created a toxic environment and no one wants that.
Having people shove their opinions down your throat sounds like something not limited to the anime community but it is something that is heavily prominent especially if those types of elitist people find out if you like shows like: Dragonball Z, Bleach, Naruto, One Piece, Sword Art Online, Attack On Titan, Fullmetal Alchamist and others. Things they consider "too mainstream". Heaven forbid should you be a fan of Sword Art Online, for instance, because you will hear all about what they think about every character, every plot hole, and anything wrong about it. Which begs the question to these elitists, if you know this much about all of these "shit anime" doesn't that mean you watched the entire thing too and are maybe just pretending to not enjoy it ??
Everyone has an opinion about the anime they love and that they hate or ones they are indifferent to it is honestly your personal preference. Anime is actually catered to personal preferences. Some people love Shonen anime like Bleach and Boku No Hero Academia, some like horror anime like Another, some prefer ecchi/harem anime like Monster Musume and High School DxD but no one is wrong in their choices and anime companies try to cater to the fans of these styles. In fact, Shonen anime is a style of anime & manga that is targeted specifically at young males between the ages of 12-18 and is usually based heavily in an action, power based fantasy style but that doesn't mean that only that age group can enjoy it they are just the target audience.
In my title I said that the anime community is toxic and should be avoided, while I stick by the fact it is toxic because it definitely is, avoiding it completely means you can miss out on interesting discussions and finding out about new things you might like. You just need to be prepared for anime elitist opinions and just to ignore them honestly because it just brings bad times. The last thing I'll leave is a link to a video done by Joey "The Anime Man" discussing the difference between Elitist and Casual anime fans, which I feel is something that some may enjoy if you didn't like or understand my opinion on it.
Anime is something meant to have fun and enjoy and not come full of drama and for now that's what the community is, drama.